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Secrets for a wonderful relationship+#8230;
Understanding: Understand your dog's behavior and how his mind works. Take some time and learn how your dog sees the world. It is important that we as trainers learn how a dog communicates his intent, emotion, and understanding of a situation. I have learned a valuable lesson from Stephen Covey+#8230;"Seek first to understand and then to be understood". Once we truly understand dog behavior, we can then begin to get the dog to understand what we are trying to teach them. Always see things through your dog's eyes. Evolution has given dogs communication skills to insure their survival. To get the most of your relationship with your dog, complete understanding is the first step. It is not as important that your dog understand you as it is that you understand how your dog sees the world. By understanding how he sees the world, you are empowered to then get him to understand you. With this understanding, you will gain heights you only dreamed about before.
Acceptance: Accept your dog for who he is, not for who you would like him to be. Acceptance is the second step in building a better relationship. When we learn to accept a dog and not judge him, he begins to blossom. Look for the good in your dog always. You can never change another by trying to make them into something you would like them to be, because they are who they are. Do not try to change your dog into someone you think he should be. It is an awful feeling when you know you are being judged. It makes all your actions be based on fear. You always wonder if you are safe and really loved. You then become defensive and I see this in so many dogs. This will only make your relationship and training more difficult. However, when a dog feels completely accepted, they can begin to shine in ways you never expected. All life needs acceptance.
Energy: Give energy to your dog and he will give it back to you. All relationship is the result of a constant give and take of energy. For a training relationship to prosper both you and your dog must exchange energy. Too often, the source of energy the handler uses is food. It is easy to fall prey to this type of training because giving a treat is easy. But if this is your only source of energy, you will see the empty results in the ring when the food is not there. When you train, give your dog your attention, love, playfulness, and appreciation! If you want a happy up dog in the ring, you must learn to give your dog your energy. It is the energy that you give your dog that allows your dog to give energy back to you. Sometimes it is hard to give energy to a dog that does not give it right back to you. I am telling you that you must generate the energy first and keep on. Your dog will come around and respond to that energy. Then you will create even more energy between you. This energy in your relationship will be what goes with you into the ring!
Play: Dogs love to play as part of their everyday lives. Play should be a part of our everyday life too. Often, we get caught up in the training and forget that our dogs need to play and be light hearted. We forget how important play is to our own lives. Play makes both our dogs and our own spirits soar. It gives our bodies and minds a chance to forget about the pressures of everyday life. Play allows us not to put too much pressure on our dogs or ourselves. If you feel yourself or your dog getting uptight, simply take a play break. This will serve to rejuvenate both of you. Think of the sport of obedience as a "game" that you play with your dog. This will make it a lot easier to keep your cool. When play and training are done right, it should be hard to distinguish between the two. Dogs love to play, so learn how to be their playmate!
Trust: Foster trust through effective communication. Trust develops in any relationship when two can communicate their wants and needs effectively. When two indivuduals understand each other, they are able to reach an even higher level of success. Together they form a relationship that is stronger than either of them alone. Trust comes from having both the needs and wants of each other satisfied. Trust is also something you develop over time. Trust builds as you commit yourself to either building or repairing your relationship. Trust takes time. Without it, you will never reach the success you are looking for. Start a trust bank with your dog and watch what happens.
Laughter: Don't take yourself, the sport, or your dog too seriously. Learn to laugh at both your and your dog's mistakes. See the humor in what you are trying to accomplish. Remember you are doing this to have fun, do not take the fun out of it. Be sure to check and see if your dog is really having fun too. Unfortunately, if we are having fun ourselves, we may fail to see that our dog is not. Dogs have a wonderful ability to understand laughter and can revel in it too! When something goes wrong, try and see the humor in it. So you made a mistake, or your dog did, it is not the end of the world. Now that is something you should take seriously! Only kidding! Remember no one will take your dog away from you or shoot you if you mess up. We do this for fun, gosh when you think about what we are trying to do, you have to laugh!
Patience: Move forward one step at a time, knowing that success does not come overnight. Of all the "secrets of success", this is the most important. Patience is not something one is born with; it is something one learns over time. Without patience, all the knowledge in the world about training is worthless. Do not get angry because you are unable to get yourself or your dog to do something. Lack of patience on either of your parts will only lead to failure. And failure itself is nothing more that learning that something does not work. I wish we could buy a bucket full of patience. I would be a rich person for I would be the first to put it on the market. Remember that both your dog and you have to learn, and mistakes are a normal part of the learning process. Be patient with yourself and your dog as your training relationship grows and moves forward!
Consistency: Be consistent in each and every interaction with your dog. The third most important "secret of success" is learning to be consistent in your expectations. Dogs learn best by understanding black and white. Something is right and will bring pleasure, or something is wrong and will bring displeasure. Be a handler who has learned not to have any gray area in your training relationship. Inconsistency is the fastest way to hurt your relationship, where consistency is the direct path to trust. Have a clear mental picture of what you want from both yourself and your dog, then pay attention to what you are doing to bring this mental picture into reality. Be consistent and you will soon see how good you and your partner can become!
Love: The result of all the above is the foundation of love that will be expressed between you and your dog. Understand that love is a verb not a feeling. When we really love someone, we apply the above secrets to the other in our relationship. We must learn that a wonderful relationship first starts with love for ourselves and that love allows us to love the other. Learn to love yourself for each of us is a special creation of GOD. Remember what Deepak Chopra said, "All relationship is a mirror of the relationship you have with yourself." When you really take time and think about this statement, you will find it is true. Love is not the answer to a great relationship, it is the outcome!
Read this often, for we sometimes forget what it takes to have a wonderful relationship with another. One of the biggest mistakes we make is to take a relationship for granted. When this happens, even the best relationship can fall apart. The last secret to a beautiful relationship is appreciation. All life has a need for appreciation. When we feel appreciated, we feel validated. This gives meaning to our lives and brings joy to our hearts! Take time everyday to be grateful for your growth and your partners, and joy will become a normal part of your everyday life!
...dies sind Worte von Terri Arnold, die eine der besten Ausbilderinnen in Obedience ist, die mir je begegnet sind. Die Frau hat einen "Draht" zum Hund, den man selten sieht. (Wie ueblich war ich mal wieder zu "faul" zum uebersetzen, aber ich fand's einfach gut . Vielleicht findet sich ja jemand, der/die fleissig genug ist, das zu uebersetzen. *g)
Gruss,
BINE
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